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Creating a Positive Relationship with Fear

February 19, 2015

retreat for couples

Leaning into our fears can be the most challenging, yet rewarding practices we can offer ourselves. We constantly have signals showing us when we’ve reached the edge of our comfort zone and our protective habits kick in, telling us to back away. However, sometimes taking that one step towards our fears instead of staying safe behind that barrier is all it takes to ignite an incredible experience of learning and growth. Guest writer, Tiffany Raether, shares her thoughts below on how to create a positive relationship with those things that scare us most in life. Enjoy and show those fears what you’re made of!

Fear is something that can meet us in so many different ways. It can feel like a lump in your throat you quickly want to swallow down. It could bring discomfort to your belly, trigger feelings of distrust and resistance or even make you dim the light you shine into world in order to hide.

The fear I am referring to is the type of fear that calls you to look inward. It can be unsettling, as it threatens the comforts in life, such as your relationships or that safe job. However, I have come to understand that fear is a symptom which precedes change.

I chose the topic of fear because it has been such a transformational teacher in my life. Through the self awareness I’ve grown into and continue to build, I have been able to develop a secure relationship with fear. I have learned that fear is a reflection of how I listen and accept opportunities in my life.

I will admit that I had a hard time writing about this topic. I had fears of my own and just couldn’t figure out the “right way” to articulate a positive relationship with fear. At that point, I decided to place it aside and listen.

During that time I was given an incredible invitation for an amazing opportunity. It was an opportunity that I had been craving, one that would challenge me and allow me to step into the direction I wanted to go in. However, when I was offered this gift, my body instantaneously froze and the thought came to my mind “what if I’m not ready.”

The dear friend who offered me this gift brought to my attention that my response to this opportunity was a reflection to the responses I have in other areas of my life. For me, it mirrored the question “was I deserving?”.

How about that for some truth.

Taking in this experience and remembering the stories that have been shared with me, I acknowledged that fear comes in many forms, of which we all encounter. Fear of rejection, fear of giving and receiving love, fear of acknowledging your greatness, trust… what ever the shape, it is something we share.

Fear is healthy. It is a tool that can shed light on the level of trust you have with yourself. It is a gift that can help you transform… if you allow it.

I invite you take a look at your fear. Try to do this when you feel it. Check in. See how your physical body is responding, acknowledge what your mind is saying and ask yourself how this response relates to other areas of your life. Where else do you feel a similar physical response? Are you holding yourself back? What can you learn from fear?

It can be hard process. Although, it helps to recognize that life is a journey. Acknowledge your destination and stay focused. As you grow, this destination may change, but try to stay present and trust. Embrace your communities and most importantly… yourself.

You are just fine.

Much love and remember to look towards the light. Tiffany, xo

Original post here.

Tiffany Raether

Hi, I’m Tiffany.

I was born and raised in southern California and currently live in the beautiful city of San Francisco. I left a career in the corporate world in order to pursue a life of purpose. I am a yoga teacher and community advocate who creates safe spaces and platforms for people to connect to each other and the power within themselves.

My roots extend across the US and over the pond to Asia and Europe. My soul families or “tribe” reside in various places around the globe and I have been fortunate to visit many of them.

I’ve been incredibly blessed with my perspective. This has come not only by adding stamps to my physical passport, but to the one within as well. My journey to purpose was not an easy road. It has been all encompassing… intense, sometimes crazy but absolutely incredible; filled with moments of peace, complete bliss, deep love, pain, success and failure.

I am using this platform to share the way I see the world, offer information on holistic health and alternative approaches to life perspectives, self love and happiness. I hope you enjoy what I have to share.